So we have been to see the consultant. He definitely thinks it's Pettit mal epilepsy. It's not harmful but it can slow the LO's development down. The consultant is sending the LO for an EEG. Then we have to decide if we treat it or not.
After tht I don't know if I feel relieved or more worried. I am glad I know what it is but worried that it will effect his Development. I just want to cuddle him and not let go.
The Royal Engineer's Wife xx
Thursday, 20 December 2012
Tuesday, 18 December 2012
My Little Man and Gorgeous Husband.
So after days of me and my husband falling out, I realised why. We are both knackered, the little man keeps getting up in the middle of the night and talking or crying. He does it 3 or 4 times a night and we both must wake up. We leave him if he is just talking away because he will go back to sleep by his self and if he is crying we leave him a few minutes because most the time he finds his dummy and puts it back in and falls back to sleep. Last night however between us I think we got up 4 times to sort him. I wish he would just sleep. I don't understand why he isn't sleeping, he used to be sooo good at sleeping.
So, plan for today to get the LO worn out we are going to take the dog for a walk and walk the LO to on his rains. We can go to the park as well. only problem is mummy and daddy are exhausted. I have no energy, I haven't even got dressed yet.
I hope my OH gets up soon so I can get ready or I wont be going anywhere but to sleep when he gets down. We have loads to do as well, we need to drop something of with the padre, go to the post office, walk the dog and I am sure there is something else!
It's a week till Christmas, a week till we hopefully have that perfect day that we haven't managed to have yet whilst we have been together. I just want us all together that's all that matters more than anything, more than the presents or the feast or what we will watch on the TV.
I have a lot to be thankful for this year, my husband came home from Afghan safe and sound, we are in a better place as a couple than were we were, my little man is growing up into a very clever happy and perfect little boy, I am getting on better with my Mother in Law now than I ever have. I have an amazing family around me that would do anything for us. I am grateful for all those things more than anyone will know.
My hopes for 2013 are that I finally sort my head out once and for all, that I learn to drive and that we get pregnant. Yes, despite have PND after my little man and all the problems it has caused I hope that next year I get pregnant and we have our 2nd and last baby. I know that might sound crazy to you but it's the final piece to our family :)
Just incase I don't blog again till after, Merry Christmas!!! Hope you have a wonderful day.
The Royal Engineer's Wife xx
So, plan for today to get the LO worn out we are going to take the dog for a walk and walk the LO to on his rains. We can go to the park as well. only problem is mummy and daddy are exhausted. I have no energy, I haven't even got dressed yet.
I hope my OH gets up soon so I can get ready or I wont be going anywhere but to sleep when he gets down. We have loads to do as well, we need to drop something of with the padre, go to the post office, walk the dog and I am sure there is something else!
It's a week till Christmas, a week till we hopefully have that perfect day that we haven't managed to have yet whilst we have been together. I just want us all together that's all that matters more than anything, more than the presents or the feast or what we will watch on the TV.
I have a lot to be thankful for this year, my husband came home from Afghan safe and sound, we are in a better place as a couple than were we were, my little man is growing up into a very clever happy and perfect little boy, I am getting on better with my Mother in Law now than I ever have. I have an amazing family around me that would do anything for us. I am grateful for all those things more than anyone will know.
My hopes for 2013 are that I finally sort my head out once and for all, that I learn to drive and that we get pregnant. Yes, despite have PND after my little man and all the problems it has caused I hope that next year I get pregnant and we have our 2nd and last baby. I know that might sound crazy to you but it's the final piece to our family :)
Just incase I don't blog again till after, Merry Christmas!!! Hope you have a wonderful day.
The Royal Engineer's Wife xx
Saturday, 15 December 2012
One of those days!
Today has been one of those days. I got up and came down to the living room loving like a bomb went off and the kitchen still not being sorted! The kitchen still hasnt been touched. So I fed the dog because he forgot to and went back upstairs to bed. I was not going to clean uo the mess that had happened why he was giving the LO breakfast! Yes that right all he had done is give him breakfast. He hadnt got him changed out of his pj's , fed the dog, sorted the mess or even read to the LO before he put him down for a nap. He had put him down waaayyy too early fr his nap as well. All that and I had only just got out of bed.
Then I got up after getting the LO out of bed and tallkig to my mum on the phone with the baby I got dresed and came down with him. He had tidied the living room and hoovered. I got the LO's lothes and asked him to get him dressed and you would of thought I had asked him to eat his poop or something the look I got. Now all week I have been telling him I wanted to take the dog out today with other people that meet up on camp and walk there dogs, he knew it was at 1.30 but yet he still decided at 12.45 he had to go to the shop to get food. So he also made us late for that.
We had a lovely walk, the dog really enjoyed it. She was very well behaved which was a massive shock but I am pleased because it means we can do it again :)
However, on the way there he decided to try and tell me how I should make my back better! He will never tell me to just do some exercise ever again! Doing exercise doesnt help it makes it worse. It makes the muscles in my back spasm more especially if I carry anything heavy as well. That is the one thing that bugs me more than anything, he doesnt have any clue how much pain I am in or what causes it, I wouldnt tell him how to pack his kit so he shouldnt tell me what will make it better.
So we came back and wathed harry potter, well I watched it he fell asleep. I put tea on he whinged he was hungry when he woke up and told e to turn it up. Then he tells me he is doing his weights tonight. I know this doesnt sound like a big deal but the deal was on a weekend he wouldnt do them because its family time and our time. I just feel like he does everything he can to avoid spending time with me. So as u can imagine Im nt impressed with that either. Every night he bathes the LO and puts him to bed. Its always been his thing, thaw fine but what I dont get is when I bath the LO he never ever cries, everytime he bathes him he cries. The LO cried before when he was giving him tea, I dnt get how he makes him cry some much he isnt a crying kid he is really good.
I am really at braking point and its only day one of leave! GREAT!
Married unaccompanied or divorce here we come!
The Royal Engineer's Wife x
Then I got up after getting the LO out of bed and tallkig to my mum on the phone with the baby I got dresed and came down with him. He had tidied the living room and hoovered. I got the LO's lothes and asked him to get him dressed and you would of thought I had asked him to eat his poop or something the look I got. Now all week I have been telling him I wanted to take the dog out today with other people that meet up on camp and walk there dogs, he knew it was at 1.30 but yet he still decided at 12.45 he had to go to the shop to get food. So he also made us late for that.
We had a lovely walk, the dog really enjoyed it. She was very well behaved which was a massive shock but I am pleased because it means we can do it again :)
However, on the way there he decided to try and tell me how I should make my back better! He will never tell me to just do some exercise ever again! Doing exercise doesnt help it makes it worse. It makes the muscles in my back spasm more especially if I carry anything heavy as well. That is the one thing that bugs me more than anything, he doesnt have any clue how much pain I am in or what causes it, I wouldnt tell him how to pack his kit so he shouldnt tell me what will make it better.
So we came back and wathed harry potter, well I watched it he fell asleep. I put tea on he whinged he was hungry when he woke up and told e to turn it up. Then he tells me he is doing his weights tonight. I know this doesnt sound like a big deal but the deal was on a weekend he wouldnt do them because its family time and our time. I just feel like he does everything he can to avoid spending time with me. So as u can imagine Im nt impressed with that either. Every night he bathes the LO and puts him to bed. Its always been his thing, thaw fine but what I dont get is when I bath the LO he never ever cries, everytime he bathes him he cries. The LO cried before when he was giving him tea, I dnt get how he makes him cry some much he isnt a crying kid he is really good.
I am really at braking point and its only day one of leave! GREAT!
Married unaccompanied or divorce here we come!
The Royal Engineer's Wife x
Friday, 14 December 2012
He's home
First night of my OH being home and I have woken up exhausted. How? I don't understand how I can have 5 hrs sleep n feel great. I have 8 hrs n feel utterly crap. I am finding it hard to keep my eyes open.
We got an appointment for my little one to see the specialist, it's next Thursday. Me n my OH don't drive so I now have to find a lift. SSAFA have to me that the med centre usually do it but getting hold of the med centre is easier said than done. I will just have to keep tryin.
My OH finishes work today for a month for Christmas. He doesn't usually got that long but he has enough days left he can take them because they need using. So hopefully it will be a lovely relaxing month. But we will see.
The Royal Engineer's Wife xx
We got an appointment for my little one to see the specialist, it's next Thursday. Me n my OH don't drive so I now have to find a lift. SSAFA have to me that the med centre usually do it but getting hold of the med centre is easier said than done. I will just have to keep tryin.
My OH finishes work today for a month for Christmas. He doesn't usually got that long but he has enough days left he can take them because they need using. So hopefully it will be a lovely relaxing month. But we will see.
The Royal Engineer's Wife xx
Wednesday, 12 December 2012
Today and this year x
I had a decent sleep last night once I got in bed. But that could be down to one if two things. One the painkillers or two listening the hypnotherapy app on my phone. Either way I was grateful.
I have only really done most the dishes n some washing today. Also, I have tidied up at the back of myself, which I wish my husband would do because it would make my life soooo much easier. But I would get more attention from telling the wall. Oh well! Just have to finish the dishes tidy the table Hoover a d sort the spare room before he gets home tomorrow.
I think I have coped better why he has been away. I think that's because I have avoided goin out. I know that might seem silly but I couldn't deal with the anxiety of leaving the house because I feel so vulnerable on my own ATM. But today I have been stressed and I didn't know why earlier. Now I think I know, it's gettin closer to the time my OH went to afghan last year. The shock and stress was horrific. I think I am worried it could happen again. Even though I know he isn't goin anywhere because I spoke to padre here and he sorted it so that they won't send rob anywhere till I am ok.
I really want this Christmas to be perfect. This will be our 3rd Christmas together n the 1st two were horrible. I just want till one to be amazing, we hopefully will be in our home as a family me my lo my oh my mum dad and brother. I just want us all together and happy. I am just hoping that next year has a lot less stress than year.
Can't wait to see my man tomorrow.
The Royal Engineer's Wife x
I have only really done most the dishes n some washing today. Also, I have tidied up at the back of myself, which I wish my husband would do because it would make my life soooo much easier. But I would get more attention from telling the wall. Oh well! Just have to finish the dishes tidy the table Hoover a d sort the spare room before he gets home tomorrow.
I think I have coped better why he has been away. I think that's because I have avoided goin out. I know that might seem silly but I couldn't deal with the anxiety of leaving the house because I feel so vulnerable on my own ATM. But today I have been stressed and I didn't know why earlier. Now I think I know, it's gettin closer to the time my OH went to afghan last year. The shock and stress was horrific. I think I am worried it could happen again. Even though I know he isn't goin anywhere because I spoke to padre here and he sorted it so that they won't send rob anywhere till I am ok.
I really want this Christmas to be perfect. This will be our 3rd Christmas together n the 1st two were horrible. I just want till one to be amazing, we hopefully will be in our home as a family me my lo my oh my mum dad and brother. I just want us all together and happy. I am just hoping that next year has a lot less stress than year.
Can't wait to see my man tomorrow.
The Royal Engineer's Wife x
Tuesday, 11 December 2012
No sleep in pain! Woohoo x
Last night I only went to sleep at 4.30am. I only had 5 hrs sleep and I have done loads today and I'm still nt tired now! This is beginning to get frustrating! I want to be tired and sleep.
I have moved things. Tidied up. I crocheted last night and got further with the massive blanket I am trying to make. Only downside to gettin my house back to normal I am now on pain and even the strong meds aren't helping! Great just what I need. Just need to do the dishes n clean the kitchen. Tidy a few bits downstairs. Then there's my room to sort. Then tidy the spare room. Then I am done. All tht as well as sort the little one and I am in agony.
Oh and I probably won't sleep much again tonight!
The Royal Engineer's Wife x
I have moved things. Tidied up. I crocheted last night and got further with the massive blanket I am trying to make. Only downside to gettin my house back to normal I am now on pain and even the strong meds aren't helping! Great just what I need. Just need to do the dishes n clean the kitchen. Tidy a few bits downstairs. Then there's my room to sort. Then tidy the spare room. Then I am done. All tht as well as sort the little one and I am in agony.
Oh and I probably won't sleep much again tonight!
The Royal Engineer's Wife x
Monday, 10 December 2012
My husbands gone x
He has gone. He has only gone to kinloss till Thursday ,so it's nt long, but it's my first time in this house on my own. I am feeling very anxious. I have locked all the doors and shut all the curtains. I am such a wimp when it comes to stuff like that. You would think after all the time I have spent on my own I would be fine.
As a result of my OH being away I won't sleep properly. So I am wondering what I will end up doing tonight to pass the time. I usually clean tidy or crochet. So it will probably one of them. I have found some painkillers so I can do anything :) I just hope that my LO sleeps ok.
Will let you all know how we are getting on.
The Royal Engineer's Wife xx
As a result of my OH being away I won't sleep properly. So I am wondering what I will end up doing tonight to pass the time. I usually clean tidy or crochet. So it will probably one of them. I have found some painkillers so I can do anything :) I just hope that my LO sleeps ok.
Will let you all know how we are getting on.
The Royal Engineer's Wife xx
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